To the Good

Praying with the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, pt. 2

But they were grieved. They wept greatly, saying, How shall we go to the Gentiles and preach the gospel of the Kingdom of the Son of Man? If they did not spare Him, how will they spare us?

Then Mary stood up, greeted them all, and said to her brethren, Do not weep and do not grieve nor be irresolute, for His grace will be entirely with you and will protect you.

But rather, let us praise His greatness, for He has prepared us and made us into Men.

When Mary said this, she turned their hearts to the Good, and they began to discuss the words of the Savior.

Peter said to Mary, Sister we know that the Savior loved you more than the rest of woman.

Tell us the words of the Savior which you remember which you know, but we do not, nor have we heard them.

Mary answered and said, What is hidden from you I will proclaim to you.

And she began to speak to them these words: I, she said, I saw the Lord in a vision and I said to Him, Lord I saw you today in a vision. He answered and said to me,

Blessed are you that you did not waver at the sight of Me. For where the mind is there is the treasure.

I said to Him, Lord, how does he who sees the vision see it, through the soul or through the spirit?

The Savior answered and said, He does not see through the soul nor through the spirit, but the mind that is between the two that is what sees the vision and it is [...]

- The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, chapter 5

When I met with my Spiritual Director last week, I told her about writing this series. I included a small confession in our conversation: I’m feeling a bit of impostor syndrome in writing it, because I don’t really know how to pray.

That’s partially true. I’ve prayed my whole life. Some of my earliest memories are sitting on the floor of my bedroom looking up and talking to God about what was going on in my preschool-centric day. I thanked God for my toys and my family. I told God about my annoyances with my friends. But these conversations didn’t feel formal enough to be called “prayer.” They were loose, organic, unfiltered chats with the Divine.

And then I went to the church of my youth and heard poetic, formal prayers, full of structured thanksgiving and petition. I heard prayers inspired by the Psalms and prayers written by professional poets. I heard prayers that led me to believe that there’s a school for prayer writing somewhere that I had not yet been invited to attend. And here, in my early 40s, having attended formal seminary education, I’m still waiting for that invitation.

I’m not entirely sure how people know how to write those flowery, decadently-worded prayers one hears on Sunday mornings or reads in devotionals. My personal prayers are still loose and chatty, never really beginning or ending, just an ongoing conversation with Holiness. And yet, despite my ignorance about the theory of formal prayer-craft, I still feel called to write this series, praying along with the Gospel of Mary Magdalene.

And maybe the holy Tower will have something to say about my doubts.

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At the close of Chapter 4 of the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Jesus—having bestowed the last of his teachings on his disciples—ascended to heaven, leaving them distraught and doubting their calling to spread his message. This is exactly where we find them at the opening of Chapter 5.

One might think that their anxiety stems from their own impostor syndrome: What if we can’t teach this message as well as Jesus did? But skill is not the issue of concern; safety is. Specifically, they say, if Jesus was killed for his preaching, what reason do they have to believe that they won’t be targeted, as well?

This is where Mary Magdalene steps in to comfort them. She reminds them of the protective power of Christ’s grace. She, the author says, turns their hearts back to the Good.

Holy One, we confess our faith wavers when you feel distant.

Forgive us our doubts in our ability to follow your example.

Help us to be like the one called Magdalene, firm in our faith, hearts turning ever to the Good.

Mary’s peaceful intervention doesn’t last long. Peter interrupts her gentle ministrations with a challenge: Tell us what Christ told only you. Knowing how Peter speaks of Mary in other gospels, it’s impossible not to read this exchange as a taunt. He knows how risky it is for a woman to seemingly put words in Jesus’ mouth. He demands she do it anyway.

Mary is unfazed, even kind, in her response to Peter. Yes, she says, I will share with you what the Savior taught. Everyone deserves this wisdom, regardless of the spirit in which they ask for it.

Help us to have compassion for those who do not have the same for us.

Let us be as loving to others as you are to our spirits.

May our hearts be open to share your grace with all we encounter.

Mary begins to share the vision Jesus gave her. She opens up about the experience of receiving such a vision, that it could be a frightening experience, but in her faith, she does not waver. Jesus praises her for this. Mary the Tower, steadfast as ever.

When Mary asks how such a vision is received, she again pulls from Greek philosophy, which understood human spiritual anatomy in two parts: the soul, which resides in the material world, and the spirit, which exists entirely in the spiritual world. Jesus answered in non-dualistic fashion, saying that it is received by the mind, which is the link between the two.

Here again, the text goes silent for several pages, just before Mary starts to share her vision.

Christ who communicates through revelations, be our comfort,

Especially when your wisdom is concealed.

Help us to see you, as Mary did, in soul and in spirit, unwavering in our faith.

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The Gospel is nothing if not full of uncertainty. Missing pages, tense scenes, unknown futures. In taking up the practice of praying with the text, we are invited to pray directly into our own places of ambiguity.

And the one who meets us there is none other than the unwavering Tower herself.

Thank you for reading! We hope you’re enjoying this series, praying through the Magdalene Gospel. Next week, we will continue with part 3. Join us then, and be sure to share this post with someone who might enjoy it!